Sunday, August 30, 2009

Nice guys exist so that women can be bitches! (A side post)

Note: If you want to comment on "Interpersonal conflict", please scroll down!

Hello once again! I can't help but share with all of you about something very interesting about Singapore women! (Men can read this as well for general understanding =P) This was written by someone on STOMP.


Over the weekend, I conducted a long-distance straw poll among five of my best male buddies who wouldn't be too taken aback at my weird, slightly belligerent question:
"Tell me what's so great about yourself."

So it turns out that most Singaporean men (if my bunch of buddies are any indication), have a pretty great impression of themselves (I'm inclined to agree with these guys, if only to not find myself suddenly bereft of male friends after this blog goes up).

"Well, I think the best thing about me, is that I'm super reliable. You know, I turn up when I say I will, I don't blow people off and I'm trustworthy. I'd never cheat on a girl." says A, whose words were more or less echoed by the rest in some form or other.

"The best thing about me, is that I'm financially secure," says B. "I don't gamble, I make calculated investments, I have a good steady job, a good income, and I save."
C pulls out the filial card: "I'm a family guy. I'm respectful to my parents, I look after my two younger sisters (he worked to pay for their education in Australia too) and I'm always around for my family."

D is good looking, fit, and one of the most athletic people I know: "I think the best thing about me, is my lifestyle. I'm healthy, I work out almost every day. I'm in shape and I like being active."

"Heck, I'm not too sure what's super special about me", but I'm just a really nice guy you know." E has so many positive traits, he can't single one out. "I'm an all-round friendly guy, most people think I'm reliable and honest and I'm responsible you know. That's why I'm good with people and I'm good at my job..."

If my buddies are any indication at all, it seems that Singaporean men, in general, are reliable, financially secure, value relationships and are all-around nice guys.

So why is it that all five of my buddies are either chronically single or divorced? They're all educated up to at least a first degree, hold good jobs, they're fit and healthy with no disfiguring illnesses, two of them are just plain rich and one looks like he could model underwear for a living.
By all means, each of them should be considered a "good catch", yet they spend Valentine's Day either alone, or trying to cajole someone out. After one too many "Lonely Hearts" sessions with these guys as their reluctant "fill in" date, I've formed the hypothesis that (some) Singaporean men are so good at their "good" traits, that there's ironically nothing exciting about them anymore. Everyone likes a reliable, trustworthy guy, but too much of that, and this fellow becomes staid, boring and predictable; the family guy who puts his family obligations first becomes a "mummy's boy"; and the financially dependable one ends up being an undesirable miserly figure who wouldn't spend on frivolities.

On the flipside, I have countless female acquaintances and friends of friends who aren't exactly the type that the average mother would be enamoured with. Simply put, they exhibit some of the worst traits of a female that I could imagine.

First of all, there's the group of chronic cheaters. It seems that one of the most deplorable traits about Singaporean women, is that when it comes to men and who they want to be with, they either can't make up their minds, or they want everyone out there. The chronic cheaters are girls who already have steady boyfriends (of years), but yet have a whole string of flings, one after another, to satisfy some apparent lack that their regular guy can't fulfil. And the amazing thing is that breaking up with their regular guy is out of the question, simply because he's such a reliable, family man (Note: Hear that, reliable, family men?) that he'd be a great investment for the future when marriage is eventually on the cards. One of these poor sods found out one day that his girl wasn't exactly true to him, but being so "nice", allowed her to have her fun if that would make her happy.Closely related to "wanting it all" when it comes to men, the other cringe-worthy trait of some Singaporean women is their unashamed materialism. They want expensive, shiny things too. A pal of mine has a friend who insisted that her boyfriend work another job so he could upgrade his car to a fancier model because his current second-hand clunker wasn't swanky enough to be valet-parked outside Zouk or something. And then there's the one who got all miserable and upset because her birthday was ruined when her boyfriend bought her a silver necklace (even if it did come with an engraved pendant), because it came from Perlini's and not Tiffany's. Both girls eventually got what they wanted though, from what I hear. So somewhere out there is a poor guy who works two jobs to pay off the loan on a swanky coupe and another's got a huge bill from Tiffany's for a necklace that although made of the same material, cost ten times more.

And then, there's the insanely jealous control freak. These are the girls with deep-rooted anxieties that make the green-eyed monster a permanent fixture. I've personally lost at least two guy friends who have disappeared down the "girlfriend abyss", simply because "my girlfriend doesn't like me hanging out with other girls..." And the crowning irony? There are Singaporean men out there who are more than willing to put up with these crazy cheating, materialistic and controlling traits, because all these girls I know, have (at least) one devoted partner.

Thinking about this blog topic that started out being more biased towards the men, I'm wondering who has the last laugh here.

The worst thing about Singaporean men, is that they're susceptible to be blinded by the flattery of a pretty girl paying them some short-term attention. And the best thing about Singaporean women, is that they're shrewd enough to suss out which guy will give them exactly what they want


(WoW! After reading this, my heart really goes out to her! She spoke my heart out even though I'm probably one of those guilty ones. It's rare that a singaporean woman criticises singaporean women! With so many realistic flaws of women which many do not realise, do you think Singaporean women are such a good catch after all?)

3 comments:

  1. Ouch! That's a fairly serious indictment of...Singaporeans in general. (I'm glad a foreigner didn't write it! She'd be thrown out of the country!) In any case, I wonder what your classmates might think. Or are all of you too young to have much experience along these lines?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow. Interesting read. The way those guys describe themselves, seem so full of themselves. Maybe that is why they are alone. Haha.

    I do not think Singaporeans women are that bad. There are always a handful of exceptions. I am sure these exceptions apply to the guys as well.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hello Everybody,
    My name is Mrs Sharon Sim. I live in Singapore and i am a happy woman today? and i told my self that any lender that rescue my family from our poor situation, i will refer any person that is looking for loan to him, he gave me happiness to me and my family, i was in need of a loan of S$250,000.00 to start my life all over as i am a single mother with 3 kids I met this honest and GOD fearing man loan lender that help me with a loan of S$250,000.00 SG. Dollar, he is a GOD fearing man, if you are in need of loan and you will pay back the loan please contact him tell him that is Mrs Sharon, that refer you to him. contact Dr Purva Pius,via email:urgentloan22@gmail.com Thank you

    ReplyDelete